I think I might be a pre-beauty school dropout. I have always wanted to be a hair dresser. I mean, this is the only thing I ever remember wanting when I was a kid. But things happened and I instead went to a little private school in California, not giving anymore thought to this hairdressing. I got a job after college and worked in social work for a few years before stumbling across cutting hair.
It all happened one night when Justin’s hair grew out to a disgustingly long molester like look. I couldn’t handle it anymore. YUCK! I could barely kiss him without puking a little in my mouth (ok, just teasing, but needed to go there to get my point across). One night, Justin was brave enough to let me cut his hair. We figured we would just shave it if it was horrible. It wasn’t horrible at all! I actually did a pretty great job if I do say so myself. From there, it was family and friend’s hair. Then they would refer me to their friends! I did this all for free of course. It sort of became my “ministry” in Paris. I loved it.
I fell in love with it, but was never in a place to actually go to school. I wanted to, but it never happened. We moved to Europe and I searched for a way to learn to cut (better) and color. No doors were opening. Then Maisie came. I still had a desire to go to school. I have been looking into part time, but just can’t really bare the fact that I would be away from her four nights a week (her bedtimes!!!!) and then all day on Saturdays!!! This is part time and would last maybe like two years!?!? YUCK! So I am beginning to think that this is maybe something I will never do. It feels weird to think of the fact that I really want to do it and may get to the end of my life and have it never happen. Will I regret this? Would I more regret missing out on little chunks of Maisie’s life? I don’t know. I feel like I am in a hard place right now. Justin is open to whatever I want to do. I just don’t want to have regrets. Can’t I have both? Wish schools would let me bring Maisie with me in the Ergo Baby Carrier! That would be quite a sight! Right now I am loving being a mom and I am not really ready to give that up, not even for twenty five hours a week.
I know this is a random post, but it is what has been on my mind lately.
I can relate so much to this post.. I had to write back. You can have both just not right now. You can go back to beauty school once Maisie and any other beautiful offspring are in school. There are just seasons of your mommy life that they require ALL of our love and attention. But if you do go now at least it would give Justin some special love time with his daughter. Either way I am with you on the waitin’ and wonderin’ what to do.. Oh my!!
Well honey…You can use your hair cutting skills on me! My hair is just waiting… I agree with Carolina. While you have the opportunity, be with your little girl. You will never regret it, and that’s an opportunity many don’t have the option of. I love you. See you Thursday morning.
Be with your girlie. She needs you. I too have gone/am going through through this choice with enrolling in a Master’s program. I want to do it, but golly, my kids need me.
yeah jen, tough choices. have you asked about the ergo? maybe it could be an option ;D dr. sears suggests taking the kids to work. who knows? seems like hairstyling would be the perfect job to wear your kids to!