In my last blog post I posted a few phrases that I didn’t realize would challenge me the VERY next day! These are my own quotes:
“Isn’t there something so fulfilling about just LIVING LIFE and doing something crazy?”
“Why do we take the easy route in life so often?”
“Isn’t there adventure to be had?”
“Why do we become complacent in our marriages or relationships or personal lives?”
Little did I know that the very next day I would be challenged to these quotes. Do I really believe what I wrote, or was it just a moment of inspiration, something to never be lived out?
Let me tell you what happened the next day. I got an email from a friend saying that there was a company called Transavia looking for blond children 4-6 and males and females 25-30 who were also blond to do some sort of advertisement photo shoot. Well, knowing that I am past the age limit (and not considering it anyways) I brought Maisie to see if we could make a quick 400-600 euros! Unfortunately, the little nugget didn’t get picked, but I did!
Let’s just say I was not pleased. This was WAY out of my comfort zone. I went to the casting and I was not happy about it. The other people in the room were all beautiful people. One girl being a very tall, skinny, and runway looking model. I felt like I didn’t belong. I wanted to get out of there as fast as I could! To say that I was feeling insecure is an understatement. It all went by very fast. Too fast. Once they called my name I walked in the other room and the photographer took a quick picture of me smiling and said goodbye.
I obviously did not get the job. The model must have got it or some other girl that came after I had already left. They wouldn’t want me anyways. I am in the worst shape of my life. My smile is not so great. You can sort of see my gums when I smile and that’s not cute. I am too shy. I’m too short. The negative self talk went on and on
I walked home from the casting thankful that it was over, but still begging God not to let me get the job, just in case I was wrong about the quick casting call meaning I wasn’t selected. Two hours later I got a call that I was selected. For real? I didn’t sleep that night. I had nightmares about what they were going to have me wear, if they were going to be mean or nice or what, and just the fact that I was going to have to be in front of a camera! I begged Justin to let me quit, but he said that I would be letting them down and most likely letting myself down as well.
I did follow through and came to find out from the makeup artist (who I adored) that the photographer and everyone else in charge knew right away the two models they wanted out of everyone that came. I wasn’t the last pick, like I had told myself I was. They actually WANTED me. Why was this so hard for me to understand, that someone would pick me and pick me first? I assumed I would be rejected, yet I wasn’t.
Well, it was three days of photos and nonstop smiling, laughing, and making new friends. I had a blast. It was so out of my comfort zone. An adventure I wasn’t expecting. The above quotes from the previous blog post challenged me personally and I followed through. I can say that I think this little photo shoot will be one of my highlights from living in Barcelona. It was good for me on so many levels and I am grateful and humbled to have had this experience.